Recently Slate.com produced a series of articles on how politics in the United States would be reported if it was happening in a foreign county. Along that line I thought about how Jesus would be reported on if the modern day foreign media was covering him below is an excerpt on how that might play out:
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News Anchor:
We are continuing to follow the sensational trial of Jesus Christ who was recently arresting in the Garden of Gethsemane after a brief struggle with authorities, that may have left one person injured.
Later will will talk to a man named Lazarus who says Jesus helped him out of a tight spot. But first we are going to go to our reporter outside the courthouse covering the trial as we await a verdict in the case.
Reporter:
We are coming to you live from outside the palace of Pontius Pilate where political dissident Jesus Christ is currently on trial for crimes of inciting the crowd and promoting a government coup of the Roman authorities. The defendant along with a ragtag group of followers from various socioeconomic backgrounds, including some government insiders, have been laying the foundation for the coup for the past three years.
Jesus came on the scene following another rebel activist John the Baptist. John had a camp set up in the desert where many follower flocked to hear his sermons about another kingdom, an apparent veiled reference to a takeover of the Roman authority. The Baptist was imprisoned and executed for his crimes against the state shortly after passing the reigns of the the movement to Jesus. Jesus statement on the works John did for the movement was “Truly I say to you, among those born of women there has not arisen anyone greater than John the Baptist! Yet the one who is least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he.”
Upon taking over the movement Jesus changed the message of the group from expecting the Messiah to one of the Messiah is at hand. He expanded the movement out of the desert and began a more heavily recruitment of followers using methods of unexplained miraculous healings and providing the masses with large sums of food. While shoring up the movement Jesus and his followers traveled extensively constantly butting heads with the pharisees and scribes, breaking the laws of the sabbath and associating with prostitutes and other dregs of society encouraging them to join the movement.
We caught up earlier with Jesus number two in command who goes by the name “Peter” though that is not his birth name. Upon inquiring about Jesus and the crimes he has been charged with Peter denied even knowing the radical leader. The others in the core group of followers have all disbanded and gone into hiding as well. As for the mother of Jesus a prominent member of the group she has been spotted with other women from the group as they prepare for the verdict to be reached. As for Jesus’ father it is unclear from reports who exactly He is.
Speaking with a Jewish authority on condition of anonymity we have learned that Jesus said he would destroy the Temple and rebuild it in three days and that he claimed to forgive sins a feat only God himself could do. Our source tells us that for these claims Jesus should be put to death.
As for Pilate he has has a range of options in this case, from letting Jesus go to putting him to death. Pilate is a Caesar loyalist and a company man who is trying to maintain his position in the government. It is not in his best interest to let this thing get out of hand and have to quell a riot from the citizens. The supporters of Jesus are many and rumor has it that some are secret followers both inside the Jewish hierarchy and within the Roman guards.
We are getting late word on the ground here that Jesus’ location was actually revealed to the authorities by someone within his own group. Our sources are identifying a Judas Iscariot as the one who gave up Jesus possibly becoming disenfranchised with direction Jesus was taking the movement or possibly other motives were at play. Judas was last seen fleeing the garden and has yet to be located. That's all we know right now as we continue to await the verdict we will keep you updated as new information becomes available back to you in the news rooms.
News Anchor:
We will keep following this story as it continues to break. Coming up when we return scientist may have a new theory of the star that parked over Bethlehem 33 years ago this week that has been a mystery ever since. Three senior astrologers who claim to have followed the star tell us what they found. That story and our exclusive interview with the brother of Martha and Mary and how he was trapped in a tomb for three days and miraculously survived. All that coming up after these messages.
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